 | Do you ever sit and think about your life? Where you've been... where you're going... Do you ever think about going back? Think that maybe you could have done some things different... that you could have treated some people better... and not taken them for granted...
There are times that I sit and look through all my photos, all my facebook and myspace friends, and I think about the moments when I met those people, or when I took that photo. I can't help but feel a little sad when I think, that photo is all that I have now. I don't talk to some of those people anymore, I don't see them... but I have this memory. I wish things were the way they were then. I've hoped that maybe I'll get another chance, that over the summers I'll see all those people again, and make things right this time... but in reality... that will never happen.
When I look at all of those people I used to know... I find that they're all going in different directions... people who used to be friends don't live near each other, they don't hang out everyday like before, they're just slowly moving in different directions. Nothing will ever be the same as it was in high school... after college... nothing will ever be the same as it is now.... as time creeps by... everything and everyone will change.
Is it bad that I'm terrified of that change? That I still have hope that I'll hang out with all those people again? That I'll get that chance to tell people how much I care?
I'm changing everyday... and that scares me to death. I'm not quite as carefree... or as fun as I was or as I want to be. I'm so worried about my grades, my rent money, my grocery money, my job... that I don't have time to go out and have fun anymore... well not as much fun anyway. I do like things how they are... and I'll probably miss these days in a few years... but right now I just want the old days back. I'm just a scared girl in this ever changing life.
Well... heres to everyone that I may never get to make peace with. I hope that you realize that you are truly an amazing person! That if you haven't changed the world, you have changed my life! I will never forget any of you and I hope that you accomplish everything that you've ever dreamed about doing. I hope that you conquer this life by being that amazing person that, to me, you'll always be. Please don't forget about me either. I would love to hear from all of you again and I would love to hear that you're still having a great time... as you keep moving along. Don't forget about those fun times... I know I never will!
So heres to change! May it come slowly and subtly. |
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